Monday, May 8, 2017

Grasping at Straws

I had about a billion things on my mind when I woke up this morning. That might be a slight exaggeration, but not much of one. As the thoughts of the weekend poured through my mind waiting to be sifted, sorted and processed - I couldn't decide what I needed more of as I opened His word to feed my soul.

Where to start? I picked up my Bible and read a verse here and there. They were all good. It's like looking in the fridge for something to eat and you're not sure what you want and everything looks good. I heard of the passing of two friends over the weekend, I tried out a new church, took Chris out twice (which is a huge feat in itself), and have a potential romantic relationship.....(what?) we don't get a break from caregiving to live life. It comes at us no matter what. We already live in a state of overwhelmed and adding anything to it can just put us into overload. Or maybe that's just me.

So, I'm sitting here looking at the scriptures and trying to figure out what it is I need, and what I can share with you today. Do I need peace? Maybe number one for today is a need for comfort? But I also need direction and clarity. I feel very needy all of a sudden (lol). So I opened my Bible to John 14 as that's where I've been studying. It was great to be reminded that Holy Spirit lives in  me - He doesn't pack up and move away when life gets complicated or difficult.

Then I moved to Proverbs (looking for wisdom) and on to Psalms (looking for peace and comfort). As you can see, I skimmed around a bit just looking and gleaning. I am not even sure what I need the most of, then it hit me. He is what I need - whatever that may be. God is with me - He is in me. I don't even have to figure out what it is I need the most - I just need Him. And He is right here.

Caregiving is overwhelming - life+caregiving = ? I don't even know what! lol. I don't have to look for "outside resources" because I have the Spirit of God living inside of me. Once again I reiterate the truth that He didn't move out or step away when we became caregivers. He didn't say - too much for me - I'm out. He moved into our hearts with the plan to stay - no matter what. He walks it with us.

So I do not know what you need today - I'm not even sure what I need today; but I know that it is okay with Him. The main thing to do when we feel like we are grasping at straws is to reach for Him. Let Him bring His peace, direction, comfort, understanding - it's a whole package deal. And He's right here. Wherever "here" is for you. For me.

Today I'm going to think about how He is all I need - whatever that need is - whether I can define it or not. He's everything that is needed. 2 Peter 1:3 will be my meditation. (His divine power has given me everything I need for life and godliness through my knowledge of Christ.) I'm going to rest in that right there - He was not only my righteousness - making me godly and holy, He made provision for me to live life in him. My meditation will be on how He has provided everything I need for living this day. And in that truth - I'll rest in Him and trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?

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