Monday, September 18, 2017

Detach-ables

Please forgive me in advance as my thoughts and studies have been all over the place this morning. The title I chose is because of how detached we can feel or become as caregivers. I'm sure we've all had friends who have detached emotionally because they were not sure what to do with us.

Sometimes it seems like people avoid us like the plague, like they're afraid we are going to ask something of them. Many seem to think we just want money - lol. I'm just shaking my head on that one. It seems like people think we are down and out just because we are caregivers. And while I appreciate their concern, and their heart - it's not stuff we need most. They don't realize we need them.

This morning I was thinking about Job's friends. When they saw his distress and pain - they came and sat. It says they sat for like a week and never said a word. That's because there weren't any words they could say that would make sense. They couldn't make anything any better by talking. They just sat with him. Speechless. But at least they sat there.

One of the hardest parts of caregiving is the emotional detachment from friends. They don't have, or don't think they have, what it takes to walk this out with us. They don't realize one of our biggest needs is their friendship - even in the hard times. But when those "hard times" don't just go away after awhile they detach. It's not their fault - they don't know what to do.

Sometimes friends emotionally detach because they can't bear your pain. It hurts them to see you like you are, or to see your loved one like they are. Our friends need permission to grieve too. In my personal situation, sometimes they don't know what to do with this Chris. They loved the old one - but this one is different and they can't adjust. I understand that. But it still leaves us to deal with their emotional detachment.

What I find cool about it all is that God never emotionally detaches. He is all in.All the time. I was reading in 1 Corinthians 6 this morning. In verse 11 it says we are washed, sanctified and justified in Christ. And He's not taking it back - He won't detach and walk away. We get a package deal in Him that's not retractable or detachable!

He also tells us He will never leave us or forsake us. Like I said, he's all in. I love that He won't leave and that His works can't be washed away by life. We are washed, period. We are sanctified, period. We are justified, period. It's all because we are in Him. It may feel like He is sitting quietly beside our pain like Job's friends, but He won't detach.. He won't take His works in us back. We are hidden in Him for all time - and for eternity too!

Today I will rejoice that He doesn't detach when life doesn't make sense. My thoughts will be on His completed work in us that life can't wash away. I'll turn my meditations to how we are complete in Him, and that we are seated in Him in heavenly places. I'll be thankful for His complete work and I will trust myself - my whole self body, soul and spirit - to Him for one more day. Will you join me?

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