Showing posts with label life's trials. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life's trials. Show all posts

Has it Come to This?

I don't know what David was going through when he penned Psalm 55, but this morning I can relate to many of the sentiments he shared. He uses words like pressure, trouble, anguish, terror, fear, trembling and horror to describe what he was going through. I certainly would not say that caregiving is all that! Actually, caregiving isn't always the worst part of what we deal with - it's the rest of life.

There have been many times I have had thoughts like David's Oh that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away ant be at rest. Behold, I would wander far away, I would lodge in the wilderness.

We must admit that caregiving can take a lot out of you. It's not a burden as such, but dealing with all the issues that are involved can really wear you down. Then add life to the equation. For instance, my mom is in early stages of dementia and we are dealing with that. For me that means lots of talks with my daddy and siblings. And just about the time you feel you've got it under control - something else happens. My daddy was just diagnosed with cancer - it's early on and there are tests to do but as you can imagine (and may have experienced) just hearing the "c" word can be devastating.

With all these life things on my plate, I would really like to fly away and be at rest! David goes on through this psalm to discuss his situation and share his feelings of despair. I'm sure many can relate. But in verse 16 he says this: As for me, I shall call upon God. Then he ends the psalm with this phrase: I will trust in You.

Isn't that always what we come back to? No matter what life throws at us, whether we are dealing with caregiving itself or all the extraneous stuff that goes with it - It all comes down to trusting Him. Period. While we were finding our new normals in caregiving, we trusted Him. Through the many disruptions of life - we trusted Him. Through divorces, abandonment, illness, betrayal, haven't we seen it all?  We still trusted Him.

And that's what we will do with today: trust Him. That's really what it all comes down to isn't it? We've made it this far - trusting Him; and we will continue to make it trusting Him. That's what it's been, will be today and will continue tomorrow. No matter what life throws our way - we will trust Him. We've trusted Him thus far - and He has not washed His hands of us yet. And the good news is that He is still patiently waiting for us to come to Him....to trust Him.

Today I will meditate on simply trusting Him for each breath. My thoughts will be on His faithfulness instead of my faithlessness. I will just continue to trust Him. Will you join me?

What Does God Want From Me?

Before my caregiving days I functioned in many roles in the church. As a youth pastor I taught the young people scriptures like Jeremiah 29:11 - that the Lord has good plans for them - for health and a future. Sometimes on the other side of caregiving, or even during life's strongest trials scriptures like this one can become muddled. If God has good plans for me, why is this happening?

His intentions for us never change. My mind goes back to the Children of Israel. God told them in Leviticus 22:33 that He brought them out of Egypt to be their God. And He said in Exodus 34:14 that He is a jealous God. The New Living Translation interpreted this verse to say He is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you. God's desire to have a relationship with His people has never changed; and is not likely to make a sharp turn over 2000 years later!

God performed mighty miracles to bring His children out of Egypt's bondage. But it was not an easy road after that - they did not have it made from there on out. In fact they faced many trials and struggles along the way. They had no water - and God provided; when there was no food God provided. He showed up each time they had a struggle even though their first thought was Let's go back to Egypt!

Caregiving is not an easy road to travel and everyone's picture looks very different. But even on a rocky road, God's heart is to have a relationship with His people - those who believe in Him - you!  He is not going to take all the bumps out of the road, or remove all the rough spots along the way. But He is going to walk it with you and His whole desire is to be in relationship with you.

I am a runner and have run a few half marathons. That's not always easy and training can be rather rough at times. But on occasion I've done training runs or races with friends. There's nothing like a long, hard stretch of road with nothing to do between the start and finish line - but talk and run - to help build a relationship. You find yourself opening up about life's deepest hurts and sharing insights that have helped you along the way.

I believe that's what God wants for us as we travel the rocky roads of life. It's what He desired from the Children of Israel as they journeyed to the Promised Land. He just wanted relationship - and that's all He wants from us today.

Today I will meditate on the fact that He wants to spend time with me - He wants me to talk to Him and share my joys, hurts, victories and failures. I will turn my thoughts toward Him today and think about how He walks this long and lonely caregiving road with me, because He wants to. And I will thank Him for desiring a relationship with me. I will engage with Him today and look for His peace while I listen for His voice in every situation. Will you join me?

Big Shoulders

  One thing that I absolutely love about God is that He has big shoulders. He can handle anything I need to give to Him to carry. God's ...