Humility is a Choice

We all have questions about a lot of different things. And really, there is nothing wrong with asking those questions; whether or not we get an answer from Him! And on a personal note - I think it's best to be totally honest with God. Think about it, does it help your situation if you are angry with Him if you do not express your feelings? Suppressing what you really feel is not healthy, and it is not walking humbly before Him. I had a friend one time who asked how I could be so frank with God even when I was angry at a situation. My explanation was that He knew anyway...I just as well be honest!

 This open honesty with Him about what you are feeling or even just how your day is going is part of being humble before Him. It will help nothing for us to come at Him shaking our fist! However, it is beneficial to humbly tell Him how you feel. And it is not a lack of humility to ask why?

Humility is a quality but it is also a choice. We can choose how we want to walk before God. We can choose the role we want Him to play in our lives. Micah 6:8 tells us to walk humbly with our God. It seems it is a major choice. 1 Peter 5:6 encourages us to humble ourselves  under God's mighty hand. This is a posture that we can take - it's a verb - an action. In this case it's a very purposeful action.

So what is the benefit of humbling ourselves before Him? He gives grace to the humble. (1 Peter 5:5) We all need His grace to help us walk through each day of our lives. As we humble our hearts and quiet our minds before Him we will find that His grace is indeed sufficient to carry us through life's circumstance!

Strength to Serve

This little walk through 1 Peter has helped me sort through many of my thoughts. But this one verse helps me bring my perspective back to where it should be. Caregiving is strenuous on body, soul and spirit. Many days you have to just suck it up and give it all you have - even though you feel there is nothing left! One way to look at caregiving is to consider yourself a servant.

We spend our days (and nights!) taking care of our loved ones. Depending on the nature of the situation we must perform various tasks of different levels of difficulty. Some just need assistance with skills associated with daily living, others maybe just need help with mobility, and still others need total care. Whatever our function is in the lives of our loved one - we can consider ourselves their servant for Christ's sake. He said there was no greater love displayed than when we lay down our lives for another. And we have done that.

1 Peter 4:11b says this: whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ....I do not know about you but depending on the challenges of the day - I do not always have the strength to carry myself through. Actually - most days I do not have the strength to carry myself through! It takes His strength to walk me through each day of caregiving. And this is true even on the "good" days.

 It is never easy to see someone else suffer in any capacity. It is also not easy to have to help someone who used to be very independent and now needs help with daily living. We must learn to walk in His strength and not our own. His strength will carry us, protect us, and help see us through one more day! Today as you serve your loved one, His child, think about relying on His strength more than on your own; you know you do not have it in yourself!

Strength in Quietness

On any given day the frustrations can mount! (maybe it's just me....) You actually schedule a quick trip to the store to grab a few items and the aid doesn't show! Or you plan an outing and your loved one is not up to par. Maybe you've called the doctor and they did not return your phone call. For me it can be the fact that my son didn't eat at all, or he will not cooperate with his exercises! Some things that seem like small things can add up to be huge on days when tensions run tight! (like spilling the bath water, tripping over a rug that's been there for months or forgetting where you put the box cutter the day supplies come in! lol!) If we are not careful there are so many things to do any given day that we can live life wound up like a taut rubber band. Trying to maintain a quiet spirit is something we might laugh at!

 But in 1 Peter 3:4 the apostle says that a gentle and quiet spirit is precious in the sight of God...This attitude is what we are to be adorned with - and God likes it! However, for me at least, a quiet spirit can be very far away! It takes effort to stop and refocus and get my spirit quiet, especially on those days when things are crazy out of control. (some people think that we are home all day and live a luxuriously peaceful life! lol!! ...what they don't know! lol!)

 The psalmist said in Psalm 46:10 that we should be still and know that He is God.He did not mention that it would have to be a purposeful action - the act  of being still...and that it is not always easily achieved inside the hectic circumstances. But I am finding that when I just stop.. for even a moment and refocus my thoughts on Him - it makes it easier to face the next daily crisis, the next decision I have to make, or the next situation that I must face.

 I encourage you today to concentrate on adorning yourself (guys too!) with a quiet spirit, and a gentle spirit before the Lord. We cannot present ourselves humbly before Him if we are ranting and raving and waving our arms about! Take a few moments today to quiet yourself before Him. (hint: you may need to do it more than once!) It will be well worth the effort - you'll find a strength in the quietness you forgot was there!

Do You Fit the Mold?

One thing that really surprised me when I began the walk of a caregiver was the rejection. We try not to take it personal by telling ourselves it's not on purpose, just that people do not quite know what to do with us. We do not fit the normal mode. We cannot always just get up and go out for a cup of coffee, grab a quick brunch with a friend or attend church like we used to. But we still have the same desires and need for friendships and relationships as those who are not caregivers. Rarely does someone cross that line and actually bring us  lunch or a cup of coffee. And there are few (and I thank God for them!) who will come and sit for a few minutes just to chat. But overall there is this rejection that must be dealt with.

 We are in good company. 1 Peter 2:4 has this to say of Christ: and coming to Him as to a living stone which has been rejected by men, but is choice and precious in the sight of God...Jesus had crowds of people following Him until He hit what was perceived as great adversity. Once there was any conflict they fled quicker than they had come! His adversity was greater than they could bear or more than they wished to deal with. And sometimes it feels the same for us - others do not know what to do with us...so they leave. Their intent is not harmful but it causes great pain nonetheless.

 I think one of the most touching scriptures is found in Job 2. It says that when his friends heard of his adversity they all made an appointment (with no cell phones, Internet or facebook) to come to sympathize with him and comfort him. And when they saw him and how badly he was doing physically, they wept. And even though later on we see that they have great problems with their theology - they sat for 7 days and nights with no one speaking a word, for they saw his pain was very great. (Job 2:11-13) This scene is so precious to me because they did not know what to do; they could do nothing to lessen the pain - so they just sat with their friend...no one knows how much that means.

We are still a part of the body of Christ even though we are walking on a different turf. And even though we cannot always go to the physical building to fellowship, and people do not always come to us - we are still one of His living stones mentioned in 1 Peter 2. The body does not consist of one building; but it is made up of all believers from throughout time. We all make up the body - we are all a part. Christ deems us worth dying for - We are just as precious in His eyes as any of His children. So do not let the circumstances make you feel like you are less a part of the body of Christ just because you do not fit the mold. We are still living stones whether we are ignored or not!

Where is Your Hope?

Along the journey of caregiving there are many disappointments. I have heard it said that when tragedy strikes you find out who your real friends are. For me this has proven true, sadly enough. Many people are willing to walk through it with you for a time, but they cannot handle a life-long commitment. But then God seems to always send true friends who can be there even when you don't know you need anything! It is certain that along life's journey (caregiving or not) we cannot put our hope or our faith in people as they will disappoint us.

 For that matter, we cannot put our hope in the medical profession either. There are some wonderful professionals that will go the extra mile and do all they can and a little more. But ultimately as wonderful as they can be they are not our hope. 1Peter 1:21 reminds us to keep our hope in God. No matter what kind of circumstances press in us daily - and for caregivers they can be many in a day - our hope must remain in the Lord.  Romans 15:13 adds this to these thoughts: May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

We cannot lose our hope in God. And I am not talking about a hope that is built around the physical. This hope is putting our lives in His hands...it rejuvenates us and strengthens us to face another day. He does not fill us with empty hopes like great wealth or perfect health...this hope goes far beyond the physical realm. It's a hope that is more than a flimsy wish. It is that knowing that no matter what comes at us in a day - He's got us. The circumstance will not change this kind of hope...it's in Him. And we are in Him...keep your hope (your life) in Him.

But I am Sober!

It is very easy as caregivers to get caught up in all the daily responsibilities and activities and get lulled to sleep by them. On one hand we are so busy there's barely time to breathe - but that can lead us right into a very sluggish spiritual state. Especially for those of us who cannot get out very much - it's easy to just sit back and become spiritually unaware. For us - 1 Peter 1:13 is a great reminder!

 This verse is the apostle's reminder to the church to prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. And from there he goes on to discuss the topic of holiness and our walk before the Lord. When you are only at home most of the time it is easy to think you may be exempt from this verse. But we must remember that it is imperative for us to stay sober in our walk as it is always before the Lord,  not before man. Man will not ever be our judge - God is. For this reason it is just as important for us to walk holy before Him as for those who live a "normal" life!

 We cannot let our circumstances wear us down to where we are lulled to spiritual sleep. Today, make an effort to stay sober in your spirit. Be ready to fight...live holy before Him!

Preserved in Him

When I read across this scripture in my morning readings today, I just had to share it. Now all caregivers may not be like me - but my whole world changed with one phone call. My life was jerked away from me in an instant. And although that has been very traumatic in every way possible one good thing is that all my religious thinking has been just as shaken. That's why I so enjoyed my meditations on this verse this morning.

 1 Peter 1:5 says this - ...who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. This whole chapter is worth a good slow read- let it be absorbed into your heart and spirit. But this phrase sort of grabbed me because even though my world was shaken that part of me that is saved - my soul - is very protected by the power of God! Think about that for a minute or two - your body did not get "saved." It's your soul that accepted Him and the changes living in Him brings.

 And while we are still scratching our heads trying to figure out if He actually protects our bodies or not we can rest assured that our souls cannot be touched or damaged in any way - because He protects that part of us. That is the part of us that is hidden in Him and it cannot be disturbed as long as we do not move away!

 Today - take time to meditate on how he protects our hearts  and souls by His power in Christ.

The Chase

  This morning, I was reading about Benaiah in 2 Samuel 23. He was one of David's mighty men, and these three or so verses are all we kn...