Still at Work!!

Lately, I've been giving more time to studying the word. One reason is I'm getting to do a little more teaching from time to time. Being a teacher at heart, means I'm also a good student. The word is invaluable! When I was in my early teens I decided I wanted to know what it said for myself. I've been a diligent student ever since. I just didn't want others telling me what it said. This desire led to a lifelong habit of putting the word at the forefront of my life.

This morning I was thinking about these things as I was reading Colossians 3. Verse 16 says  to Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly. And right before that, Paul tells the reader to Let the peace of God rule in your hearts. I think that little word "let" has a really big implication.

My question was the application of these two scriptures. Mostly, I was thinking about letting the word dwell in us richly. My thoughts were back and forth in scriptures wondering how I could let it rule. In the Old Testament, Moses instructed the Israelites to write the word everywhere. (Duet. 6) The point being it was to be at the forefront of every conversation, every meal, every get together etc. Perhaps Paul is thinking along the same lines as he pens these words to the new believers.

For me, when I became a caregiver, sometimes the simplest scriptures and instructions got complicated. One example is how Jesus gives us the commission to go - but I couldn't do that. I loved living Him in the streets and taking the gospel to the nations. But how was that going to be possible as a caregiver? Well, this verse in Colossians is just as applicable on the street, or in the jungles of Africa as it is in our living room. Just let the word of God do it's (or His) thing in us.

Now here's the cool part - His word is at work in us. There is no place where the word stops working. Life doesn't become to complicated or hectic for His word to say - that's it I quit. There's no line drawn in the sand where the word says I'm not going that far. Nope. His word is alive and active (Hebrews 4:12) and that doesn't exclude us caregivers. The word is powerful enough to cut through our circumstances and bring change in our hearts and lives.

Isn't it great to know that the word still works? We don't have to qualify for participation! Hebrews says He wrote His word in our hearts - and it's up to us to do the letting - letting the word have free course in our lives, letting it light our path, letting it fill our hearts, and letting it be in first place in our hearts and minds. His word has the first and last word in my life.

Today I am just going to be thankful for His word. I'll turn my thoughts to how it's brought comfort in my distress, it's brought healing to my soul, it's been peace in the storm. My meditations will be on how His word - spoken and written - has strengthened me and kept me sane! I will be concentrating on the "letting" part of "let His word dwell in you richly" today. Will you join me?

Availability

Yesterday, I had the honor of speaking with a fellow caregiver. It was so refreshing and rewarding to spend the time in conversation! Even though our circumstances differ, we found much in common. I love connecting with other caregivers like that, it is quite inspiring. Caregivers are awesome.

Some of the simplest things can be complicated by caregiving. It took us a couple of tries to find a time that worked for both of us to make that call. No big deal for either of us, we adjusted what we needed to so it would work. One of my earliest frustrations was having difficulty scheduling things. Even yesterday, I was trying to explain my situation to a client. He wanted to give me a "full-time" position with set hours. He couldn't understand why I couldn't commit to it. I explained I could commit to a certain number of hours but not specific hours I could put in.

I tried to carefully explain that if I said I was going to work 1 to 4 each afternoon, something would come up. Nurses, case managers, doctors and supplies come whenever they want! lol. And of course, as sure as we commit to something we are sure we can manage something goes wrong. Our loved one gets sick or any number of things.

The hard part about not being able to keep a specific schedule outside of caregiving is that people stop inviting. They think we don't want to have coffee, go to the movie, etc. The truth is we would love to do those things. But we never know when something pressing will come up. It can feel isolating at best. Eventually, we adapt and for those patient souls, we figure out how to make it work.

The cool thing is that God is always on hand. He doesn't have office hours that He tries to make us adapt to. He longs to be with us whenever we can do it. He's on-call whether it's 2 in the morning, or 11 at night. He is available.

Now here's the catch, He wants us to be available too. When He calls, can we answer? On one hand, it can seem unfair. Why should He want us to be available, doesn't He know how much we have to do? I have to say that I love it when He tugs on my heart. Maybe I have a song of praise that rises up, or a prayer on my heart for a friend. But when He nudges, I choose to meet Him there. The cool thing is that that He still wants us to be with Him. How awesome is that? He doesn't ignore us or stop inviting because the schedule is too tight. He continues to draw us to Himself. He still wants us to experience His love.

Today, I will make it a point to think about how He wants to be with me. My thoughts and meditations will be on how He loves me and how He doesn't abandon. My schedule is never too hectic for Him to care and reach in for me. And I'll meet Him when He calls, and I will let Him hold me as I trust Him for one more day.Will you join me?

The Faithless are Faith-Filled

I was reading in Galatians this morning about the fruit of the spirit and the deeds of the flesh. My thoughts ran along the lines of how whatever fruit we exhibit shows everyone what we've been trusting, following and believing. That doesn't seem fair for the caregiver I don't think.

Seriously, I know we are still accountable - but it's like life is stacked against us. I'm speaking somewhat in jest - but does God really expect us to be patient?  And then it's tested on a daily basis - aides don't come or call, supplies are on back order again, chair malfunctions, or our loved one is just cranky and we can't fix it. It all adds up and it can keep us on the edge all the time.

Love? Everyone? Personally, forgiving the young man who caused the wreck (and it was a true accident) is a daily thing sometimes. He virtually took my son away and yet it is my spiritual responsibility to forgive and restore. That's not easy - but it's do-able.

Then there's joy. Really? Yes. Because our joy is rooted in what He has done for us spiritually, we can still have it even in the most adverse circumstances. His is a joy that remains. His joy will carry us through.

If anyone is longsuffering though, it's the caregiver. We know how to stick with it even when sticking isn't fun or joyful. We won't give up on our loved ones because of the deep love we have for them. We will literally fight tooth and nail to protect them and get what they need. We'll stick with it no matter how long we have to, how much paperwork we get stuck filling out, or whose office we need to storm - all for our loved ones.

You know what's cool about all that? That's exactly how God feels about His kids. He sees us in our pain, in our inadequacies (whether perceived or real), in our frustrations, tiredness, and any other state we as caregivers find ourselves in. He still loves us. He still cares for us. He still carries us - even if we are fussing and cussing the whole way. (Yes, I have done that....)

In my mind I can see Him scooping me up in His arms while I'm still griping; and He just carries me along until I can stand and begin to make forward process once again. He is so patient, gentle and loving with us. Our fatigue doesn't scare Him. Our frustrations don't force Him to quit. His grace remains extended throughout our longest days and darkest nights. Our confusion doesn't baffle Him and He doesn't even condemn us for it. He just waits for us. He carries us when we need it. He knows us. He even knows when we lie about being tired.

Nahum 1:7 says this: The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble, and He knows those who take refuge in Him. He knows those of us who are quite alright with Him picking us up before we hit the ground. He knows those of us who are trusting in Him as our refuge. He knows those of us who are gonna gripe first, and snuggle in later. He picks us up when we call His name. He knows we are going to continue to trust Him. Even if we falter, get frustrated or feel like we are faithless He will carry us. We are never faithless - because He is faith-full; and we have Him. He has us.

Today I'm going to think about this visual of me in His arms. I will let Him carry me. I will let Him heal the deepest wounds life inflicts. My thoughts will be on His care for me. My meditations will be on His faithfulness. And in His faithful arms I will rest and trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?

Moving Day!

I hate the thought of moving - so thankfully, I don't have to worry about it right now. Probably at some point, I'll be moving from this apartment and boy do I dread that day. Today's blog title is about a different kind of moving.

This morning I was studying in John 14 and 15. These chapters along with 16 and 17 are some of my favorite passages. They are just rich and you can pick about any verse and dive into the topic and be there all day. Today, though I got stuck in verse 23 of chapter 14.

The verse reads this way in the NASB: If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him. Translated to me means this: if we love Him and keep His word - He's moving in!

Now I don't know about you, but when I do move - I take all my stuff with me. I load everything in a truck and take it all. I take my clothes, my bedroom furnishings, my workout equipment, appliances, my BOOKS! And I move everything to my new abode. I take all of me and all my stuff.

When God says He will make His abode with us - He brings all He is and all He has too. He moves all-in. Once again we see no exclusionary statements - He moves all in unless..... This means the caregiver gets just as much of Him as anyone else. We get all of God when we keep His word too. He doesn't love us any less nor does He withhold anything from us because of our situation - we have equal rights and equal access just like all His other children.

Today, I'm going to think about how He moved in and has no reason to leave us. My meditation will be on how I have all of Him - He holds nothing back. My thoughts will be about what might be in me that would inhibit Him from consuming every space in me. I trust Him to live inside me and make any arrangements that need to be made. I'll trust Him for one more day, will you join me?

Strength Upon Strength

As usual, my thoughts are all over the place. But it seems they have landed in a good spot, Psalm 29. I love this psalm and have read and taught from it numerous times. I like the fact that it starts with me giving God strength and ends with him giving me His strength. Not a fair trade for Him, but it sure works for me.

There can be many things that sap the caregiver's strength throughout a day. Because we live so on the edge of our emotions it doesn't even take much. As a teacher I used a term "reinvent myself" for what I had to do every day before I went back into the classroom. I knew that each day I had to be fresh, new and energetic for my students to receive from me. I think we have to reinvent and regenerate ourselves as caregivers all day every day. Then the littlest thing topples us off the edge.

We carry such a load, any straw can be THAT straw - the one that breaks the camel's back. The funny thing is though - no one will know it. We figure it out. Like yesterday when the aide didn't call or show - I just shifted into get 'er done mode and started completing all his tasks. It's no big deal - just exhausting to keep reinventing ourselves over and over. Or maybe a better way to say it is we keep reaching down inside deeper and deeper and finding more to work with. Because we have to. We do it numbly and don't even realize it most of the time.... or maybe that's just me.

So today as I was reading this psalm it meant a little more to me. I really don't have the strength in myself, but I find it in Him. He strengthens my hands for battle - and for caregivers, life can be a battlefield. That applies to just about everything from finances to emotions to our physical being. But He will make us victorious as we give it to Him and accept His strength in us.

Today, I'm going to think about how He strengthens me day to day. My thoughts will be on how He fills me with Himself and doesn't take anything back. I'll meditate on Ephesians 3:16 that says we are strengthened with might by His Spirit in our inner man. And I will just let Him be my strength today I won't try to do it on my own. Will you join me on that?

Challenging and Rewarding!

If you were asked to describe caregiving in one word, what would it be? I thought of this earlier and found it difficult to nail down. Caregiving is challenging - but also rewarding. It's difficult - but easy to choose when we follow our heart's love. It can be confusing yet simple. Caregiving can be hectic - but peaceful. Peaceful? I'm not sure I would use that word to describe what we do everyday. Would you?

Initially, I started this conversation in my head when I was reading 2 Thessalonians 3:16. I was doing a little online devotion with a FaceBook group this morning and my eyes scanned across it. I was talking about praying scriptures and was running through several of them in Thessalonians. I have a bunch of scriptures marked - underlined and a "p" beside it so I can pull them out and pray them when appropriate. The one thing is that I call them "generic" meaning they work at any time for just about any person or situation.

While I was teaching all this today my attention was grabbed by this one scripture: Now may the Lord of peace Himself continuously grant you peace in every circumstance. My mind stuck there for awhile as my thoughts ran away. Can He really give peace in every situation? Even for the caregiver? I have to say - yes. He can grant us peace in our situation - then it's up to us to let His peace reign in our hearts and minds.

Today, I will concentrate on letting His peace reign in my heart, mind and situation. This scripture will be my prayer and my meditation today. But I want to go beyond that just a bit and make room for the letting His peace reign. I will focus on His peace rather than the hectic schedule for today. As I rest in His peace - I'll trust Him for one more day - will you join me in letting His peace reign today?

The Little Things

Ever heard the saying "sometimes it's the little things..."? I don't think there's a caregiver out there who would disagree. But for us sometimes it's the tons of little things that add up until one becomes the straw that breaks the camel's back.

There are so many things on our daily plates. I have no idea how many times I've said, "just one more thing" goes wrong and I'll..... just deal with it, right? There are disconnected social workers who like to make rules that don't apply to them - or worked in their situation but are devastating in ours. Supply orders that get messed up - every single month for months in a row. Aides that don't show up - the one day you made plans. And this list could go on and on and on.

But I've learned something else over these nearly 9 years of caregiving. It's also the littlest things that can weigh the most in making a day go better. Like the fact that I discovered these $5 flowers in the photo. It's not expensive - but I enjoy looking at them. They last for about a week and just brighten my day. They add just a bit of beauty to my life and I like it.

It can be a kind word or gesture while you're out in public. It can be as simple as a card in the mail or an email that lets you know someone out there is praying for you. But now let me flip this around on you. YOU may be the kind word or act of love the aide needs to hear today. Your case manager has a full plate too - and they may be on the verge too - and you can either be their one more thing for the good - or for the bad.

That doesn't seem fair does it? I mean - we are in a tight situation at best. Caregiving on any level is stressful, difficult and emotionally wringing. But that doesn't give us a license to abuse others or be anything less than a blessing. I've said it before that we are not exempt from following the Word of God just because of our situations. There are no exclusionary statements like - this applies to everyone but caregivers. 

Our words can still be seasoned with grace. (Colossians 4:6) Sometimes we want certain scriptures to apply to us like My God shall supply all my needs according to His riches in glory. Or My peace I leave with you.....but we want to forget about some of the others. We want all the goodies but not the requirements, right? Caregivers do deserve a break, right? I don't think we get a break from righteousness.

But this is a good thing, you know why? Because everything in the Bible still applies to us. He is our righteousness. He is our wisdom. He is our strength. Those promises do not fade. He doesn't pack up and move out of us when we begin caregiving. He remains. The foundation of God stands firm having this seal - He knows those who are His. (2 Timothy 2:19) So I'm glad things don't really change for us spiritually just because of what happens to us naturally. Aren't you?

Today, my prayer will be that my words will be seasoned with salt and that I can be a light from here in this dark cave. I will be thankful that caregiving doesn't create a dam that holds back any of His promises. My meditations will be on how He knows  me, and I don't scare Him off. And since He's here and I can't get rid of Him - I think I will trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?